Wednesday, November 27, 2013

Part Masculinity English edition

Life bites
Part Masculinity English edition

We all know everything and that's a given. All of us are experts at most things; but sometimes we forget, it is in our nature. This is a list of facts about Masculinity and all things MANLY, nothing you didn't already know, just think of this post as a reminder.

Enjoy


- The men are not men , men are Men with a capital M !

- Men do not cry

- They only feel pain

- Men do not feel pain, ever

- Well, give me your hand and I'll show you
I will not do anything stupid
It won't hurt , no
-OUCH
-What? Did that hurt? What kind of a man are you?
Oh, don't cry! Let's go do donuts with the car

- Propper Men eat well

- You're not a Man if you don't eat the whole plate

- What are you eating? Are you eating again? Stop eating god damn you! What kind of a man are you?

- You're not a Man if you can't chew 10 chewing gums

- You're not a Man if you can't chew 10 chewing gums with the wrapper

- You're not a Man if you don't eat shit, now!

- Proper Men drink

- You're not a man if you don't drink alcohol

- What are you drinking there? Rootbeer? Stop drinking that! These are for sissies! What kind of a man are you?

- You're not a man if you don't drink scotch. Only scotch! Preferably Johnny Red with coke , but I won't tell you what to drink , you're a Man; you know!

- You're not a Man if you don't drink 10 shots

- You're not a Man if you don't drink 10 shots of urine now !

- Proper Men F*&k
- FUCK (sorry, keyboard didn't work well for a while)

- You're not a Man if you haven't been with a blonde

- You're not a Man if you haven't been with a brunette

- You're not a Man if you haven't been with a redhead

- You're not a Man if you haven't been with a camel

- What are you doing there? With my camel? You perverted SOB! GET DOWN FROM THE CAMEL NOW! What kind of a man are you?

- Proper Men do what I do, ME!

- You're not a Man if you don't do what I did in bed yesterday

- You're not a Man if you don't do what I did on that island, on a beach with two tourist girls

- What are you doing there? Is that how I do it?
Is it? Oh, it is... OK then, go on


Universal truth about Masculinity
You're not a man if you did't do what in my mind I did, I ate and I drunk, that time in that place which probably doesn't exist

No comments:

Post a Comment